July 13th, 2009
“He remembered his sadness well, but he could no longer remember what had made him so sad. It was that way with everything: even sadness passed, even pain and despair, as well as the joys. Everything passed, faded, lost its depth, its value, and finally there came a time when one could no longer remember what had pained one so. Pains, too, wilted and faded… Yes, doubtless this pain, this bitter need would also grow old and tired. It too would be forgotten. Nothing had permanence, and he regretted that, too.”
- Herman Hesse, “Narcissus and Goldmund”
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Am continuing my reflections on the possibility of a “Nietzschean Buddhism”…
Would like to sit again…
I’ve found something valuable in my practice. Hey, I may have not changed much but I detect a glimmer of hope… the possibility of overcoming deeply-ingrained bad habits of old. I’m no superman but like him, “I’m just out to find a better part of me.”
I came to Vipassana as a pantheist with Nietzschean leanings. I had strayed away from the Catholic Christian Church in the mid-1990’s. It was meeting Nietzsche (through his books, of course) that brought about my “conversion.” I found quite a number of my very deepest feelings and thoughts verbalized by this “madman.”
I became an atheist, an agnostic, a Buddhist (yes, a Tibetan Buddhist with the name “Namgyal Dorje”), until finally settling down with pantheism. A Nietzschean pantheism.
Vipassana, of course, need not be identified with any “-ism.” It is a meditation technique (involving breath and bodily sensations) that can be practiced by anyone whatever his/her religious/philosophical beliefs. Countless Christians, Moslems, Hindus, atheists/non-religious have taken the course and maintain the practice without necessarily becoming “Buddhists.”
However, insofar as it was the meditation technique practiced by Gotama the Buddha, and involves concepts and teachings that are commonly labeled as “Buddhism,” I’m playing with these questions in my head: “Is the technique, Vipassana, essentially tied up with the teachings? Or can it be separated from some (if not all) of the teachings?”
I’ve been reading up on Buddhism. And I remain convinced that the “nibbana,” “nirodha” they speak of ultimately involves the cessation of life (and the desiring which is inevitably linked with living). Rody (Vera) pointed out in a reply to one of my “buddhistic meditations” last year that Buddhism doesn’t necessarily involve the renunciation of desire but of the craving or attachment that goes with it.
My point exactly! Can one not desire “passionately” and still be without craving or attachment? And since I’m pretty sure “passion” is a no-no in the official teachings of Buddhism, let me rephrase that question: Can one not desire “ardently,” without developing craving and attachment?
Still, in the ultimate scheme of things, “nirodha,” the cessation of suffering, through which one attains “nibbana,” is made possible through the cessation of life and desiring.
The idea of reincarnation is thus linked with “nibbana” and “nirodha.” (I’m no great fan of reincarnation. I mean, it doesn’t matter to me much whether it’s true or not.) When one becomes fully enlightened, an “arahant,” a “buddha,” one will no longer be reborn into this world of “dukkha.”
“Nibbana” seems to me to be like “moksha” (liberation from “maya” – the illusion of this world). One is no longer reborn and somehow reunites with “Brahman,” with “God.”
But these are the metaphysical stuff. It’s true that I’ve long been attracted to eastern religions and mysticism (Buddhism, Hinduism, Sufism).
My ultimate concerns, however, always go back to the ethical/practical. I may not be the most practical of persons but when it comes to philosophies/beliefs I always look at its ethical applications.
To live life. And to live life well and to the best that one can. The main teachings of Buddhism: compassion and wisdom. As, I think too, with all “true” religions.
I need no convincing in the admirable qualities of compassion and wisdom that the Buddha taught.
Yes, I think it’s the idea of the “extirpation of desire” which is my main “quarrel” with Buddhism.
And here I side with my teacher Nietzsche. I have the deepest respect and reverence for the great compassion and wisdom of the Buddha. But I have love for and affinity with Nietzsche. Because we both want to “desire.” And “desire ardently!”
to be continued…
best regards,
ian
—
A poem by Miguel Hernandez from “El Rayo Que no Cesa” (The Unceasing
Lightning):
¿No cesará este rayo que me habita?
el corazon de exasperadas fieras
y de fraguas colericas y herreras
donde el metal más fresco se marchita?
¿No cesara esta terca estalactita
de cultivar sus duras cabelleras
como espadas y rigidas hogueras
hacia mi corazon que muge y grita?
Este rayo ni cesa ni se agota:
de mi mismo tomo su procedencia
y ejercita en mi mismo sus furores.
Esta obstinada piedra de mi brota
y sobre mi dirige la insistencia
de sus lluviosos rayos destructores.
—
Will not this lightning ever cease
filling my heart with wild beasts,
brewing anger and blacksmiths
where even the newest metal withers?
Will not this taut stalactite ever desist
from cultivating its tensed hairs
like swords and dense bonfires
in my howling and screaming heart?
This lightning neither ceases nor dissipates:
its origin comes from my very being
and it exerts its furies within me.
From me, this obstinate stone rises
and its destructive lightnings
rain at me endlessly.
—
Anicca… anicca… anicca!